Actualization

It's interesting how we as people, with access to unlimited amounts of knowledge and infinite wisdom, can formulate complete sentences, hold intelligent and stimulating conversations, yet continuously make excuses for why we individually process certain situations, formulating thoughts that develop mechanisms to cope and not comprehend that the very organ used to create this persona or escape, in spite it's wondrous complexity, is the same organ that we have been given free reign power to control. We constantly manipulate ourselves to think that our direct faculties during our development are why we think and process the way we do rather than allowing our mental comprehension to say that we create the thoughts because of our development. I understand that it's easier to place blame or displace guilt on situations and people. It's soothing to temporarily run, hide, and cover up our issues. But when are we going to stand up and take ownership over ourselves and realize that these vices are mere vacations from our realities? A person can either remain in this vacation state allowing inner struggles to conflict their true happiness or face their truths head on and live in actual liberty. We need to understand that the situations we face shouldn't create our thoughts but challenge our way of thinking.

Staying In Touch With Yourself

I'm up at almost 3am reading the book, "Stillness Speaks" by Eckhart Tolle, a book of sayings to help one focus on staying connected within, and the first phrase of chapter 1 goes as follows:

"When you lose touch with inner stillness, you lose touch with yourself.  When you lose touch with yourself, you lose yourself in the world!"  

These words resonated in me, speaking volumes, stirring up my desire to share my thoughts. The magnitude of this passage is the very reason many of us are in the situations we face today.  We have lost touch with the inner stillness, and in return have loss touch with ourselves.  But what is this inner stillness Tolle is referring to?  Inner stillness may be defined many ways based upon the individuals interpreting this two word phrase.  But as it relates to me and my life, and the revelation I get from it, it deals with the peace that lies dormant within our lives.  Though I come from a spiritual, non religious, christian faith background, I'm not referring to the Christ within because there may be some of us who don't believe in His existence.  I'm referring to the power of peace that we as human beings have been granted the right to possess.  Often times we allow our circumstances or those of others to rob us of our joy.  When you do that, you relinquish your rights as individuals over to the power and control of those people or situations.  As a result, like the saying says, "you lose touch with yourself."   When you lose touch with who you are, you open the door for the woes of life to dictate the path in which you should travel. You began to fall victim to the treachery and deceit of manipulation because your gift of discernment or your conscious self, has been stored in a vault, way at the back of your mind like those experiences you strive to forget.  You become lost and the only way to find your way back is to search and find that peace or inner stillness.


In Russell Simmons book, "Super Rich", he refers to stillness as "a quiet, peaceful mental state that allows you to be completely present in life.  A state of what I call, "pure presence," in which you're more connected to the world and as a result you experience moments that feel sharper and more intense than your normal existence."  What Russell is simply saying is that when you have allowed yourself to reach a mental state of peace, not only do you appear but you become present.  Your aura, presence, spirit, or swag becomes a force field around your physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual being.  You began to radiate with love, security, and true wealth.  Essentially, this is that way of life that we all should seek to strive to accomplish.  Many reach this state late in their latter years of life while some never get there at all.  But why wait till you are old and full of life's experiences to decide you want to have peace.  Don't allow the world to push you into this state, go there on your own.  And how you might ask?  Its quite simple.  Sit still, listen and learn YOU!  You possess the power to be happy.  You possess the power of peace.  Its in your dna. When you know your identity, or who you are, then you know that you have the potential to do a be any and everything you desire.  But in order to gain identity, you have to deal with yourself.  Deal with your flaws, insecurities and your mistakes.  Correct them and build them so that they become just as strong as your gifts.  ONLY YOU HOLD THE KEY TO HAPPINESS, USE IT TO UNLOCK PEACE!

Change Is Essential

You must be the change you wish to see in the world. ~ Ghandi

Change is a major part in the equation resulting in success. In order to become successful, you must be flexible. Flexibility, in the context in which I am using the word, is the ability to bend and adapt to your environment and situational factors. It first starts in the mind and is a mental step towards progression. Have you ever wondered why you feel like your life keeps going in a circle. And it seems like you keep getting the wrong answers to your problems.  Maybe it’s because your mind is processing the circumstances in the same manner at every occurrence.  Look at things in a different point of view. Your perspective of life affects your perceptions on life.  The way you see things influences your processing and understanding of that topic.  Change is not always a negative thing. It is very much necessary. It requires patience and perseverance. Change is not instantaneous. What appears to be an overnight success is nothing more than the fruits of one’s labors. It’s just that we aren’t aware of the process in which those have gone through.  In order to embrace change, you must look at things differently to gain a different understanding.

The Man Box

Tony Porter discusses this theory called "The Man Box" which explains the mentality of men, especially those of Color. How valid is his philosophy?

What Defines a "Real" Man?

There is an on going debate that a "real" man is defined by his masculinity or the ability to carry himself as such, regardless of whether he handles his responsibilities.  We are often taught that as men we should carry our self a certain way so that we don't appear weak. This is especially prominent in the black community, where showing signs of weakness is not acceptable. Men aren't supposed to cry, we are to remain strong. Provide for the family and be the backbone of our households. As we already know, that role has long gone unfulfilled considering the large number of single family household ran by the women, and in a lot of two parent homes, the woman makes more money, leaving the wife to be the primary provider. Should men feel inadequate?